i have dreams about your friend.

When I was 19 I had sex for money repeatedly. Only a few close friends know of my secret (some of which did the same thing). I have never told my boyfriend of 5 years because I am scared that he will leave me. I truley have forgiven myself for this, but I don't completely feel worthy of forgiveness. I want to scream it from the rooftops so that everyone will know and I can sleep at night, but I am afraid that no one will understand or want to be around me.

bill i like you....completely and totally....except that your kind of ugly.....cept when we talk it seems perfect......just it never fits.......how will it fit........what needs to happen......i dont know.......i need to know.........ive liked u for years.

My best friend and I were very close, and when we were last in the same area we got a lot closer. We talked about what would come of it, and decided that being friends was not enough. We were having the time of our lives, not to mention mind blowing sex. When I left, we had a big falling out. I am in the military, and I can't afford to stay home without permision. She didn't tke the idea of being apart well at all, and ended the relationship. I am still very much in love with her, and would like to tell her, but I don't want to scare her off. What should i do?

I am my own secret. I know that the man I love knows I love him for more then what I say but I wont tell him for I dont ever want to ruin what we have now. Im not sure it would but I know he has more then enough on his plate right now with his ex, she's got his mind locked up, and she messes with him so badly I dont understand why he doesnt just tell her to get gone. That's the biggest one, the smallest, I stand at five foot eight inches and I say Im 120lbs, but Im 113lbs, Im tired of people saying Im to thin when Im not.

Okay so heres the thing, I come from a christian family in which is really messed up, when i was younger a pedaphile started jacking off to the site of me, I started to notice that I liked girls in grade 2 and everyday i try to convince myself that i like guys (it really doesn't work)I started to cut myself when i was in grade 8 and I'm trying to quit but sometimes everything just gets overwhelming. I have low self esteem yet everyone tells me i'm pretty...it pisses me off for some reason...maybe because looks don't matter when you know you will be alone until you actually come out of the closet....